There are times when we'd love to be a fly on the wall - preferably out of reach of rolled-up newspapers and other dangers -and today is one of them.
It's all about a meeting happening in London today, between representatives of the UK's top eight research funding providers and the establishments that receive that funding.
And why would we like to be a fly on the wall there? For a start, this meeting hasn’t received a great deal of fanfare in the UK press - not, at least, that we've found yet - and no doubt it's going to be held in one of those fabulous locations with extremely high ceilings, thereby minimising the chance of somebody rolling up a fine example of said UK press, and swatting us with it.
Concordat for Research Integrity
It's all to do with the Concordat for Research Integrity - an agreement to be signed by all 133 UK universities and colleges of higher education. It's something that shouldn't have to be put into place, at least in an ideal world, but as we grow older, we tend to discover just how un-ideal this world can be.
But the stakes are high: every year we taxpayers and certain parties in the private sector fund research to the tune of around £20 billion, and those establishments who refuse to sign on the Concordat's dotted line won't see a penny of it.
So what are those 133 universities and colleges signing up to? It's all to do with research claims, many in the field of medicine, that have had to be retracted due to breakthroughs that haven't been properly evaluated, plagiarism, genuine mistakes ... and even downright lies.
In fact, it’s been estimated that as many as ten percent of those research claims contain completely false data.
It does happen: just a couple of months ago one researcher was jailed for falsifying information about experimental anti-cancer drugs which wasn't picked up on for ten whole years.
And that, when it comes to medical matters, could end up being life-threatening. And when it comes to compensation claims, very expensive.
So the Concordat for Research means that establishments such as universities not only have to be impeccable when it comes to their research data, they have to be even more impeccable then it comes to the people carrying out that research. They'll be required to prove they've got the right team selection and management abilities in advance ... and every year they'll have to demonstrate that their team members have got all their facts totally correct.
Now if we really were a fly, up there on that high wall today, we'd be able to use our legendary compound eyes to watch people putting their signatures to the Concordat ... while checking out who's crossing their fingers behind their back.
